After much delay, here finally is an update. There will be at least one more chapter on this, but we're definitely headed for home here...


The word invasion probably seemed like an exaggeration to anyone who didn't know the Shepherds, but to Derek it was the only way to describe the pending arrival of his four sisters and his mother. The knowledge that they were within hours of landing in Seattle, where they would, no doubt, take absolute control of his life for the next few days, was enough to make him want to hide under the covers.

Unfortunately, burying himself under a mountain of blankets wasn't really an option because with his family's impending arrival only hours away, he needed to get out of bed and over to the house to make sure he had it as presentable as an unfinished home could be. While he was ahead of his original schedule, the interior was still a work in progress, the plumbing and electrical both now underway with the contractors he'd finally chosen. But once that was done, Derek planned to go back to doing most of the work himself. Each time he had necessarily brought others into the project, he started to feel antsy. And though his discomfort was worth the progress, Derek was convinced the therapeutic nature of his efforts got derailed every time he needed help on the build, and that left him frustrated.

He suspected that what he'd hear about most from the female Shepherds was the lack of any visible evidence of a decorating plan, but the truth was, Derek had postponed making any decisions about those elements until it was time to start doing the actual work. It had kept him from getting too far ahead of himself mentally with Addison. He wanted to present her with a finished home, hopefully near the point where she finally felt ready to join him in it. By waiting to consider paint colors for the walls that weren't covered in wood or deciding on the countertops for the kitchen, Derek was giving her time to believe in them again, and when his heart wanted him to speed up the process of winning her back, the house was serving as a concrete reminder that investing the time would be worth the end result.

There was daily evidence to support that theory. Derek had become a part of Addison's life again, and they had gone from tentative daters to nearly constant companions not overnight but over weeks, months--with careful effort and real caring put into making it happen. He remembered once hating how hard everything with Addie was... it had been part of their downfall both in New York and here in Seattle. He'd wanted easy, craved less complication. But as he'd worked his way out of the quagmire that had been his anger over Addison and Mark and his own affair with Meredith, Derek had learned that avoiding the hard stuff was what had turned his life into such a mess. If he'd had the guts to confront the not-so-easy things as they'd happened, maybe he wouldn't be hoping now to reclaim his own family.

Derek opened his eyes and glanced at the clock. Deciding that he could spare another five minutes before he actually did climb out of bed, he inched forward and snuggled closer to the beautiful woman laying beside him. Addison responded to the contact by dropping her arm over his where it was draped across her.

It was hard to remember that there had been a time Derek used to be grateful for nights when sleeping with his wife meant just that... sleeping. But he knew there had been times during those hard months when she'd first come to Seattle and they had started living together again that he used to hope she'd just crawl into bed beside him too tired for anything more than a quick good night kiss. Even when things had gotten better and they had really reconnected physically, Derek's guilt over his feelings for Meredith had always been a complication.

Now, though, Derek was just glad that he was here with Addison at all and tried not to think about how hard it was to keep being this close to her without the physical intimacy he missed and thought about all the time. Being able to hold her was certainly a vast improvement over laying alone in bed in the trailer missing her. When Addison had plans with friends or was working late and Derek returned to his own bed, well, those nights were just long and lonely enough to keep him grateful for they were now as a couple. He knew his sisters were happy for them, too, and his mother was, of course, overjoyed. But he couldn't shake the feeling that exposing their relationship to full family view could be a disaster waiting to happen.

"I can hear you thinking."

Derek chuckled and nuzzled his face against Addison's neck.

"That's the ticking clock in my head that's counting down to the invasion."

She laughed and turned over onto her back, her face turning toward him.

"They are a force to be reckoned with when they're all together. But at least they're here focused on the baby and the shower... maybe that will help."

"Oh, it'd sure be nice to think so." Derek eased closer to her and placed a kiss on her cheek. "But these are my sisters we're talking about. And you know how they are."

Addie chuckled and let her hand fall on his cheek. "I'll protect you. I promise."

There were moments sometimes as he strove to reclaim the life he'd given away months earlier when Derek would just suddenly stop and see Addison and think to himself that for all his mental self-scrutiny, he still couldn't fathom that he had thought his life would be better without her in it. It was never because of some big event, either, but rather in a small, everyday tick of the clock like this morning, her eyes still heavy with sleep, her smile a little crooked because she had only reluctantly let go of her dream... in those heartbeats of time, Derek could still see his whole world wrapped up in Addison, and that he had forgotten that was only evidence of how lost he had become.

"Why are you awake so early?" she asked, and Derek returned his focus to now and her and the unimaginably cozy bed he was about to leave.

"I need to go out to the building site."

"You're driving all the way out there before work?"

"Gotta clean the place up for the family. All we need is for Nancy or Kathleen to trip over something, break a limb and be stuck in Seattle indefinitely while they recover."

Addison laughed and pulled the covers up, snuggling under them in a way that made Derek want to forget all about the house, work, even the plans he'd made for tonight and just stay where they were all day long.

"You didn't have to stay here last night, you know? I can spend one night alone, and it would've saved you the trip back out."

He snuggled back down with her, deciding five more minutes couldn't hurt.

"I realize you are perfectly capable of spending a night alone when Stevens is on call, and yes, I could have slept at the trailer and saved myself the trip, but then I would've been all alone in my bed. And why would I want to be all alone when I could be here in this bed with you?"

"But you're a flannel wearing, wood chopping fisherman. Aren't ridiculously expensive, fabulously comfortable beds beneath you now?

The jest, born out of their horrendous attempt at marriage counseling, came to her easily, a wicked little grin on her face, and Derek felt the normality of it, of them, fill him up inside.

"You know, it's funny," he answered, leaning in, stopping only when his lips were just barely above hers. "I find my appreciation of expensive, comfortable beds has grown exponentially since you bought this one."

When his mouth brushed over hers, Derek's intention had been a light kiss, contact to match their playful tone. But the one quick kiss turned into two, three, and then it deepened to the point that when Addison pulled away from him, Derek assumed it was because she, too, was in desperate need of air. It was only when his eyes finally opened and focused that he saw a quick flash of her tear-streaked face as she sat up and turned her back to him.

"Addie?"

The trembling in her shoulders told him she was still crying, and Derek scrambled onto the bed and, kneeling behind her, he pulled her back against his chest as his arms circled her.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"It's nothing," she said, her voice breaking and showing it was anything but.

"Okay. But I'm just gonna stay here and hold on to you while nothing's going on, okay?"

Addison's answer was to relax into him, and so Derek did as he'd promised... he held on and waited for whatever was going on to run its course. Several minutes later, she pulled away from him, but only to turn slightly on the bed, and Derek shifted his body so they were sitting eye to eye.

"Anything we need to talk about?"

She was still fighting tears, and Derek reached out and took hold of her hand. Addison responded by shaking her head and chuckling softly despite the moisture on her cheeks.

"I'm a crazy, hormonal freak. That's all."

"Oh," he said, laughing softly, "is that all?"

"I just..." Addie paused and took a deep breath. "Do you remember the night we went to the Salish Lodge for dinner?"

"It was our third date. First time you let me take you somewhere for more than coffee. And we ate in the Attic Bistro instead of the main dining room because the Bistro had vegetarian lasagna, and you said the baby was craving it. So we gave up the reservation I waited two weeks for and the Bistro it was."

At her surprised look, Derek shrugged. "It was a big deal to me that you said yes. It was out of our comfort zone, you know? No place we'd been before, no friends close by, no emergencies to escape to back at the hospital. So it was worth remembering."

She smiled and squeezed his hand.

"It was a great night. I remember thinking we hadn't talked like that in forever. You know, just talking about things that weren't medicine or our problems. I still giggle every time I think about that story you told me about Richard falling in the lake."

Derek chuckled at the memory of both the original event and of the way Addison had laughed when he told her the tale that night in the restaurant.

"Then that guitarist started playing while we were having dessert. And we just sat and listened, and I didn't feel like... it wasn't like before, in New York. I didn't feel like you were with me because you had to be or because you felt guilty. We were just together. And when we came home, I... it seemed like it was too soon, you know? After everything we'd been through, it felt too soon, but... I really wanted to be with you that night. And I didn't ask you to stay because my head was all 'too soon, too soon,' and now..."

Addison's eyes dropped and Derek reached out and gently bumped his finger against her chin to prompt her to lift her gaze.

"And now you're worried that I'm not going to understand if you don't want to?"

Her shoulders slumped in response to his question, and Derek's heart broke a little because he understood the doubt that was weighing on her. Of course, when he'd been in her position not so long ago, he had figured he probably had it coming for the way he'd taken the chance to be with Addie for granted before. So it was kind of karmic justice that right when he had never wanted her more, Addison, exhausted from working too much and just generally from pregnancy itself, had zero interest in sex.

At first he'd worried it was another wall between them that still needing tearing down. Their dates had gone from ending with short, sweet kisses to long, drawn-out make-out sessions, and Derek had assumed that the next step would be for one of his sleepovers to advance past the cuddling stage. So when it didn't happen, he started to get worried that somehow he had pushed too hard or done something to make Addison hold back. But thankfully instead of falling back into old habits, Derek had taken the risk of looking foolish, and he asked someone he trusted what he should do before he put his foot in his mouth or did something to hurt Addie again.

[i]"There is no possible way I can ask this question without sounding ridiculous," Derek prefaced as Miranda Bailey kept her eyes on the lunch she was trying to eat in peace in the doctors' lounge.

"I'm used to it," she answered back. "So go ahead, what is it?"

He put his hand on the back of the empty wooden chair in front of him and he squeezed the hard surface, perhaps needing the support in case the answer he received was as bad as he suspected it might be.

"You know that Addison and I have been... well, spending a lot of time together."

Bailey's eyes narrowed. "I do know, yes."

"So things have been good. And I've been staying over a lot, you know, after we have dinner or whatever, and I was just wondering if she, um... has she said anything... about... me staying over?"

He paused, hoping that he'd said enough to get his point across without having to spell things out. He realized he had when Miranda scoffed and tossed her fork down.

"You are not seriously in here asking me a question about your sex life, are you?"

"I told you I would sound ridiculous," Derek countered, defending himself. "And I know I should ask her, but, Bailey, come on, you know what the chances are of me somehow saying exactly the wrong thing if I bring this up with her, and you women, don't you talk about these things with each other?"

"Of course we do," Bailey retorted, "but we don't tell each other's husbands what was said."

"I am a desperate man here. Do you not see the desperation on my face?" Derek pulled out the chair he'd been gripping the back of and sat down, leaning on the table. "I just want to make sure I haven't done anything to make her feel unsafe with me. Because I'm fine with us not..."

The resident put up her hand, halting any further description of what they were not doing.

"I'm fine with things not moving on," he continued, "but I know how sometimes she gets scared by things I don't realize are scaring her, and I just... she's so stressed out about going on maternity leave and leaving her patients and she's so tired, and I just... I don't know, I was worried."

Derek sighed heavily, feeling the full impact of that worry deepen as he spelled it all out. His eyes fell to the table and he started to trace the grain of the hard surface with his right index finger.

"You do realize you just answered your own question, right?"

He looked up and found Miranda looking at him not with her earlier annoyance and amusement, but with sympathy.

"She's stressed out about leaving her patients, she's exhausted, she's going through 8-, 12-hour surgeries and she's nearly 8 months pregnant... and in case you missed that part... she's nearly 8 months pregnant. Derek, Addison feels about as attractive as a manatee, and it's taking every ounce of energy she has to get through the day. That's all that's wrong."[/i]

It made perfect sense, and Derek had felt a little ashamed of himself that he'd gone all worst case scenario instead of seeing what should have been obvious to him. But as he'd worked at installing the subflooring in the house, Derek managed to forgive himself a little. It was still hard for both of them not to get a little scared at every small misstep because not caring enough had once cost them both so much. At least this time, he'd had the sense to stop, think and even ask for help before a blip turned into a disaster. And the day he'd talked to Bailey, he had made a point of pampering Addison when they finally called it a day and headed back to her house. The evening had been filled with her favorite take-out for dinner, a hot bath and, after he consulted the book Addison had in her office about what pressure points should be avoided during pregnancy--a massage to help her sleep.

As he'd been working on her lower back, Derek had started talking about her maternity leave, and he reminded her that she was only a phone call away if one of the other doctors in the NICU or the Perinatal unit needed more information than was in her notes. He suggested that she see if Izzie or Miranda could join her for an overnight trip to the Willows Lodge Resort for some professional pampering, his treat. And then as they settled down to go to bed, Derek had suggested they go out for a fancy dinner on her last day at work. Addison had chuckled and shook her head.

[i]"You realize that would require me to go shopping and try to find something fancy dinner appropriate that will fit over... all of this," she said, waving her hand over her body. "And shoes? My poor shoes are all just staring at me from the wardrobe wondering when they're going to get worn again."

Derek smiled and turned on his stomach, propping up on his elbows so he could lean over and kiss her silk-covered belly.

"You'll find a dress... and shoes... and we'll go out to dinner, and I will watch while every man in the place wishes he was me."

She rolled her eyes. "Right, the guy with the redheaded whale at his table?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "More like the lucky bastard who got you pregnant."[/i]

He'd thought to keep his unwarranted freak out to himself, but now that Addison was upset, Derek confessed it, right down to his conversation with Bailey. She was more than a little surprised that he'd not only felt as insecure as she did now, but that he'd actually gone to ask one of their friends for help.

"My pride was a little bruised," he admitted with a shrug. "But even though we get stronger every day, there are days, you know, where I just... I worry."

Addison offered him a small smile.

"I know it sounds like a weird thing to say, but it's kind of nice that you worry about us."

"Well, it's probably my turn."

That made her chuckle, and Derek felt a weight slip off his shoulders at seeing her feeling better. He leaned in and kissed her once before pulling back slightly so that he could look her directly in the eye.

"I miss making love to you. But I could be missing it with no chance of ever being that close to you again. So what's a few more months, right? Besides, it gives me extra energy to finish the house."

She burst out laughing at that, and then she kissed him.

"You really asked Bailey about our sex life?"

He nodded and put up his hand as if swearing on a bible. "And now you can never doubt how much I love you, ever, because really, I thought her glare was going to melt me."

By the time Derek was in the Rover headed for the house, he was a good 45 minutes behind schedule, but it had been worth it. When he left, Addison was sound asleep, Doc curled up beside her, the alarm reset to get her to her last day of work on time, her worries pushed away by their talk. And that meant he needed to refocus on the things he had to get done today both in and out of the hospital so that he could really relax and enjoy the special night he'd planned for Addie to help her ease into maternity leave.

Of course the one thing he couldn't really prepare for was the pending Shepherd clan arrival, which left Derek a little terrified. He knew they'd only have the best of intentions, but thoughts of them hounding Addison about a wedding date had him near a cold sweat. They were in such a good place, this morning providing further evidence of how far they'd come; him able to support her and Addie trusting his concern. He couldn't really bear it if his family did something to upset the balance they'd found.

God, he loved them all; he really did. But there were times Derek would just look up at the sky and curse his father for leaving him alone with a gaggle full of females. And now there'd be another one... and this one, he knew, would have him wrapped around her little finger from the moment she drew her first breath. The fact that this Shepherd female would probably come equipped with dazzling red curls and a killer smile guaranteed he would be her slave for life.

Derek wondered if his father had felt the same way about his daughters. It was something he and his dad hadn't really talked about much, mostly because both men had just assumed there'd be more time for those talks down the road. Time had cruelly robbed them of the chance for the elder Shepherd to tell Derek the secret to how you balance the desire to protect your little girl--something he was already feeling acutely--with the inevitable need to let her grow up. It seemed a daunting task to walk such a fine line, and his baby wasn't even here yet. Derek couldn't imagine how his father had managed it four times.

The tightness in his throat and the stinging in his eyes nearly made the neurosurgeon pull over on the side of the road. He missed his dad all the time, but now the absence felt all the more profound because John Shepherd wouldn't be there to see the little girl Addison was bringing into the world. It was one hurt he was powerless to help or heal, and Derek vowed to himself to remember that time was precious and not something to be wasted when it came to his family. He had done enough of that already.

With a sigh, Derek turned toward the property. He blinked in surprise at seeing two very familiar cars parked in front of the trailer. After parking the Rover, he hopped out and walked over to where Richard and Preston were sitting on the trunk of Richard's sedan.

"We didn't have plans I forgot about, did we?"

Preston sipped coffee from a travel mug and shook his head.

"We just decided to come out."

"Yeah," Richard continued. "Thought you could use a little distraction before all the hubbub starts."

With that, the chief pulled a fishing rod from where it rested against the far side of the car.

"Guys, I wish I could, but I gotta put away all these tools and clean up..."

Preston put up his hand to stop Derek's explanation. "It's done."

"What's done?"

"The cleaning up, the putting away the stray lumber... it's all done."

Derek looked from the cardiothoracic surgeon to their boss and saw him give a small shrug.

"Sloan might have mentioned something."

Remembering his quick rant to Mark during an early morning coffee break the day before, Derek nodded. It made sense now.

"We have about 45 good minutes left," Richard offered after a glance at his watch. "Consider it a... guy version of a baby shower."

"Fishing as a baby shower?" Derek asked.

As he slid off the trunk and stood up, Preston only shook his head. "I just brought the coffee."

Laughing, Derek told his friends he'd meet them at the lake and then he jogged off to grab his favorite rod off the trailer's porch. As he moved, though, Derek thought about Mark's kindness. The reality they both lived with was that they might never be ready to have a drink together or take in a game--the regular best friend things they'd shared without thought once before. But it felt right somehow that his oldest friend had acted without being asked, even if Mark couldn't provide the day's needed distraction himself.
It was the kind of gesture his family--a circle that had included Mark for years--was famous for; even when one sibling was barely speaking to another, they always had each other's backs.

His family... his odd, incredible, dysfunctional beautiful family... they were all coming together to celebrate Addison and their baby. And as he strolled toward the lake, Derek resolved to stop worrying and just enjoy it.

*****

"Dr. Stevens, can you tell me the basics of the cleft palate repair?"

Mark began to wash his hands in the scrub room as he turned to catch the blonde's eye. Stevens had come back to work a week after Addison's nursery decorating party. The plastic surgeon was positive she had come back in part so she could give him grief daily about inviting Derek to the gathering without telling her first.

"We make incisions on both sides of the separation, and then move tissue from each side of the cleft into the midline of the palate to join muscle together and make a sturdy enough structure so the patient can eat and speak normally."

It was no surprise Izzie was prepared. She had returned to the intern program determined to distract herself from her grief by studying twice as hard, trying to get into even more surgeries and generally working herself as hard as she could without falling over. It had taken time and a few stern lectures from Addison and Bailey to get the young doctor back on something of an even keel, but still Izzie pushed herself harder than any intern Mark had ever seen.

Sometimes he thought that Stevens was convinced that if she became a better surgeon, if she knew every answer, then somehow she would be safe. The trick with a belief like that though was what were you trying to stay safe from... from getting to close to another patient... from getting close to anyone... or from just getting hurt again, period?

He found himself worried about her, an unusual thing for Mark given that, for the past two decades, his concern outside of an O.R. had rarely extended past his adopted Shepherd relatives. The first day he'd become aware of it, it had stunned him to realize he'd become close enough to someone outside of that circle that he sometimes caught himself just walking around wondering how she was doing. In fact one day, he'd ended up in the cafeteria at lunch looking for her, only realizing how public his search had become when Yang, Grey and Karev all eyed him and asked why he was staring at them.

Mark glanced up from his work at Izzie, noting her serious face as she stared down at Billy Timmons, the 2-year-old little boy who was their current patient.

"You okay there, Stevens?"

"Fine," she replied, the answer coming a little too quickly for him to believe it. "I just wonder what must be going through his head, you know?"

"I think he knows that we're helping him. I think he knows that his parents believe that we're helping him, so he believes it, too."

Focusing, Mark began the delicate work of building up tissue within the midline of the palate. His fingers continued to work deftly even as Izzie replied to him.

"Wow. That sounded... almost human. Are you sure you're you?"

"Oh, so I got the smarty pants intern today, huh?"

He heard her chuckle and beneath his mask, Mark smiled.

"Oh, you know, I promised Mrs. Shepherd I'd ask... you didn't invite anyone extra to the shower tomorrow, did you?"

"God, woman, let it go, already."

Now Izzie was laughing, as were the nurses around them. On another day with another intern, that might have annoyed him, but today he was fine with it and he let out a low growl that only amplified the laughter.

"I know, I know, 'Stevens, if you'd seen his face...' I've heard it a thousand times."

"Only because you keep bringing it up," Mark quipped. "But it also happens to be true. He looked like his puppy ran away from home, all down-turned lip and sad eyes while he tried to convince me he was okay with not being there to help decorate his daughter's nursery."

"Oh, sure, not like that situation was his fault or anything. I mean, I get that he's been great lately but, you know, for a while there... major jerk face."

It was Mark's turn to laugh now. "Agreed. Major jerk face... but he needed a chance to prove he'd bounced back from that."

"You still could have called and told me he was coming."

"I couldn't call and tell you." Mark made a second small incision on the right side of the cleft where there was more tissue to work with. "You would have totally given it away to Addison with that goofy thing you do with your eyes."

"What goofy thing?"

Mark looked up and caught sight of two his favorite nurses, Linda and Kay, trying not to laugh out loud.

"Linda, tell her what goofy eye thing I mean."

Izzie looked over at the nurses only to see Linda shrug and say, "the wide-eyed, no blinking thing."

He felt the blonde's gaze return to him and without missing a single surgical beat, Mark winked at her.

"Told you so."

Two hours later, after he finished speaking with Billy's parents about his recovery time, Mark walked back to his office to find he had company... company bearing a steaming hot bone dry cappuccino.

"Aren't you supposed to be packing up to get outta here?"

Addison rolled her eyes at him and started to stand up from the couch, but Mark rushed forward, grabbing the coffee and stopping her.

"I got it. You stay where you are."

It was obvious she wanted to protest and declare herself perfectly capable of getting up off the couch, but after a moment of consideration for her sore back, Addison relented and sank back against the cushions.

"Thank you for the coffee."

"A little bird told me you were a nice guy today. So I figured it was the least I could do."

Mark took a sip of his cappuccino and eased down on the couch beside her.

"I know how he gets when his whole family's gathered up. I mean, not that they aren't great, but they can be... daunting."

She laughed and nodded. "Indeed they can. I hear you got ordered to the shower, by the way."

He shook his head, remembering vividly how his months of ducking calls from Patricia Shepherd had ended with Bailey telling him there was an emergency call for him on hold at the nurses' station. If it had been anyone else who had duped him, there might have been bloodshed.

[i]"This is Sloan."

"As in Mark Sloan who has not phoned me or returned a message of mine in a year?"

Patricia's words were cold, but her voice carried the same warm, motherly tone he remembered.

"I wasn't sure I could take the tongue lashing," he replied after delivering a glare in Bailey's direction. "Not that I haven't earned it."

"Mark, really... if I can forgive Addison, what makes you think I can't forgive you?"

He sighed and leaned against the counter, wishing he were somewhere more private than where he was.

"You're a part of this family," the older woman said. "You made a mistake. So did Addison. So did Derek. And mistakes get forgiven in this family. You got that?"

Despite the tightness in his throat, Mark chuckled. "Yes, Ma'am. I got it." [/i]

The command that he be present at the baby shower was, Mark knew, really an invitation to rejoin a group of people he loved, people he thought he'd given up when he decided to pursue Addison in spite of her marriage to Derek. But maybe the real lesson of what he and his two oldest friends had been through was that love could forgive anything if you just gave it the chance.

"Can you imagine me at a baby shower?" he asked, shaking his head at the insanity of the idea. His expression drew a laugh from the redhead at his side.

"Hey, you put half the nursery furniture together. Why not? Besides, it's not like you'll be the only guy there. I think we're using the term 'baby shower' quite loosely here, what with all my male friends and colleagues coming."

"So who all is gonna be there?"

Addison stretched and sank back further into the pillows behind her. "Richard, Adele, Preston, Bailey, Tucker, all the NICU nurses, my scrub nurses, the interns. My house is going to be filled to the brim."

"A Shepherd in every corner, too." Mark sipped his coffee and tried not to sound as nervous as he was.

"Aw, don't worry. I promised to protect Derek. I'll protect you, too, even from Nancy."

"Oh, like I can't handle Nancy-Pants?"

"Do I need to remind you about the Hamptons back in '99?"

Mark grimaced and put up his empty hand in surrender, not wanting to relive the humiliation of having been run into the ground by Nancy on a 10-mile jog that turned into an endurance race.

"It's hard," Addison said, "believing that it's going to be okay. I mean, I know things are fine between me and Mom and with Nancy and Kathleen, and Kath says Mary and Leslie are excited about the shower and everything. But... they're still Derek's sisters, and no matter what, I'm still the woman who cheated on him. Sometimes I wonder if it can ever really be the same."

"And I'm still the guy who took advantage of you and betrayed him," Mark said, completely understanding the hesitancy she was feeling. He had counted on the Shepherds to be his family for so long now, but from the moment Derek had walked out of that bedroom in New York, he had accepted their loss as part of his punishment. He knew that the same feeling of disconnection had plagued Addison right up until she had packed and left to come to Seattle and fight for her marriage.

"I'm sure it's all going to be fine," he said, trying to reassure her. "I mean, you, me and Derek have managed to forgive each other. What's anyone else got to say that matters after that?"

Addison smiled at him and nodded.

"See why I keep you around? You really are a good friend when you want to be."

As she spoke, she squeezed his hand, and Mark smiled at her, relieved to feel like he was really helping her. Then he heard someone clear their throat and he turned and felt his heart nearly stop.

Patricia, Nancy, Kathleen, Mary and Leslie Shepherd were all standing in the doorway staring at them. Then Nancy stepped forward, heading toward them.

"Oh, Mark, give it up already. She picked the cute and cuddly boy over you, so move on."

"You know," Leslie chimed, "there are models with broken hearts all over Manhattan because you're here pining after my sister-in-law."

"Models, nurses, stewardesses, the girls who spray perfume in malls," Kathleen added dryly.

"Now see how my sisters are?" Mary walked over to Mark, grabbed his hand away from Addison and pulled him to his feet. "All this bitchiness and not even a hug yet. I save my bitchy for after the hugging."

Mark lost it then, laughing as Derek's youngest sister pulled him into a tight embrace.

"See, Mary, that's why I've always liked you best."

Nancy hit him on the arm and then plopped down next to Addison on the couch.

"He's such a liar. Hot, but such a liar. And how's my favorite sister-in-law? And don't start with the divorce and 'ex' stuff because as Mom pointed out, the Pope didn't sign off on it, so you two are still married."

Mark collected hugs from the rest of Derek's siblings while Addison gave them all a full report on her health and the pregnancy before they swarmed around her on the sofa. Soon he was standing face to face with the woman who felt more like his own mother than the one who had given birth to him.

"Hi, Patricia."

The older woman opened her arms and Mark stepped into them, and if he hadn't been sure it would've resulted in Nancy chasing him through the halls teasing him, he might have cried at the relief the embrace let loose inside of him.

"Handsome as ever," Patricia said and then she squeezed him a little tighter. "I'm really glad to see you."

"Me, too," he replied, his voice a little hoarse as he tried to hide how emotional he felt at seeing this woman, this family again after so long.

"So we're done now, right? No more dodging phone calls or ignoring my messages?"

Mark felt his lips curl up into a smile, and he nodded.

"All done. Everything is... I guess it's all back the way it's supposed to be."

Patricia glanced over his shoulder and Mark turned, catching sight of all the girls on the sofa. To Mark, other than Addison being eight months pregnant, the scene could have been any day he'd walked into the Shepherd home and seen them all in a gaggle gossiping about one of Mary's boyfriends or planning a birthday party for one of Leslie or Kathleen's children.

Addison laughed at a joke of Nancy's, and she looked up, her eye catching his a moment. Mark could tell that she, too, felt it. They were back where they belonged.

"So what are we all doing tonight?" Leslie asked. "Because I am sans husband and children for the weekend, and I don't plan on going to bed early."

"I agree. A fabulous dinner, someplace with a decadent dessert menu and a very fully stocked bar," Kathleen added. "And Derek can pay. It's the least he can do for moving so damn far away from home."

As the girls continued to talk about plans for the evening, Patricia made her way over to Addison and navigated the flurry of gesturing hands around her daughter-in-law to get a hug. But Mark didn't miss the look of concern on Addison's face as she tried more than once to fend off making any plans only to have the sisters insist they had to make a night of it. Sensing there was something going on he wasn't privy to, Mark realized that he needed to don his knight in shining armor for Addison one last time.

"I was actually planning to take all of you lovely ladies out for the night, if that's okay with you. After all, you want Addison to get a good night's rest for the shower tomorrow, right? And I'm here to tell you, if Addison's staying in, you'll need the jaws of life to get Derek away from her. So what do you say? I know where to find the best steak in town, and I can invite along a few cute single doctors."

As Nancy agreed for them all and the girls went on excitedly about the night ahead, Addison mouthed a silent "thank you" to Mark. He replied with a wink and then he set his mind to figuring out just how he was going to convince Izzie to talk Karev and O'Malley into braving the Shepherd women at dinner.

*****

Banished from her own home so that her in-laws and roommate could put the finishing touches on what Mark had dubbed "The Great Baby Shower Event," Addison sat on the chaise lounge in Miranda Bailey's living room and watched as Tuck assembled a tower of plastic rings. It was hard to tell from his giggles which the little boy enjoyed more, building up the stack or knocking it down.

Addison laughed, wondering what games her little girl would enjoy a year, two years from now; peekaboo, building with blocks, maybe making sounds with a musical instrument? Remembering a story Patricia had once told her about Derek, Addison was praying that a love of banging on pots and pans wasn't something Shepherd children inherited.

"Okay, we have hot chocolate for the mama-to-be," Miranda said as she entered the room carrying a small tray, which she set down on the coffee table before handing a cup to Addison.

"I have tea for me and, Mr. Tuck, I think I have some milk for you."

The toddler clapped and pulled himself up on the table to take the sippy cup from his mother's hand. Drinking deeply from it, he then let himself plop back down on the ground, where he returned to his intense plastic ring construction project.

"You look like you need a nap."

Addison blew on her steaming cocoa and nodded in response to her friend's observation. "I just might. And this heavenly stuff right here might do me in."

Miranda chuckled. "Well, you got time, so drink up and lay back. I oughta take back some Attaboy points from that man of yours, keeping you out till all hours."

"Oh, stop it. We had a good... no, make that a great night, and it was worth the tired this morning."

"Feel free to keep the details to yourself," the resident teased. "I have heard more than enough about Derek Shepherd's romantic exploits for one lifetime."

The two women fell into an easy silence as Addison drank a few more sips of her cocoa before laying back to rest her eyes, and Miranda indulged herself with a scan of the new "Martha Stewart Living" to peruse the craft projects she loved but would never have time for.

She was tired, Addison thought, but she'd also been honest. The night had been more than worth it, fancy dress and barely comfortable shoes notwithstanding.

Of course, there had been the scare that the evening would be hijacked by Derek's sisters. Addison had been trying to figure out how exactly to save the day when Mark had jumped in and done it for them. His offer to wine and dine the Shepherds had come in the nick of time. She'd recounted the whole story to Derek as he sat on the bed waiting for her to finish getting dressed for dinner.

[i]"You know, I really think your Mom would have tried to help us out, but Nancy and Kathleen were already talking about some restaurant they'd looked up online and Mary just wanted to know if it had a good martini bar. And Leslie, I think, said something about new Stuart Weitzman's that needed to be taken out on the town."

Even though she was in the closet, Addison heard Derek scoff.

"You and Leslie and the shoes. I don't think I'm ever going to understand that."

Addison laughed and called out to him as she fastened a sterling silver teardrop earring on her right lobe.

"This from a man who collects fishing rods."

"I could feed our family with my fishing rods."

Surveying herself in the mirror, Addison sighed and decided it was as good as it was going to get. The deep purple wrap dress had cap sleeves and a deep v-neck. A small detailed trim ran along the neckline, and where the dress wrapped and tied, a delicate single ruffle ran down to the hem. It was cotton, but the touches dressed it up, and the fabric felt incredible against her skin, which is what had sold her on it. Being comfortable was nearly impossible at this stage of the game in a pregnancy, but at least the softness helped.

"I'll have you know, Dr. Shepherd, that I could probably use my shoes to feed our family, too. Of course, it would be a different kind of fishing."

She made the joke as she emerged from the closet, a pair of black strappy Kenneth Cole
sandals in her hand. The shoes were adorable, simple and they had a non-slip tread on the bottom to help ease her concern about slipping as she waddled along.

"That is not even remotely funny," Derek quipped, but he was smiling at her, and he offered his hand to help her balance as she eased onto the bed to slide on her shoes.

"It was a little funny."

"It was not," he said, shaking his head. "But since you look so damn gorgeous in that dress, I'll forgive you."

She was considering a comeback when Derek slipped down to his knee, taking her right shoe from her grasp. Addison sighed with relief as Derek slipped the shoe onto her foot, then repeated the process with the left sandal.

"Now see, that's love right there. I'm gonna get you some major Attaboy points with Miranda and Izzie when I tell them you helped me put my shoes on."

Derek rolled his eyes as he stood up and offered her his hand.

"I still can't believe your friends are scoring my efforts to win you back... or that you're encouraging them."

"Hey, I almost always defend you and argue for extra points. Except the day you ate my piece of carrot cake. That day, I told them to take 20 away from you."

Their easy banter continued as they climbed in the car and headed for dinner. Though Derek wouldn't tell her the exact location, he assured her that the place would be a hit because he'd asked Adele Webber for suggestions.

Moving through the city, Addison let her eyes scan the various structures they passed, the music coming from the CD player easing away the remnants of regret she felt at packing up her things, even temporarily, for maternity leave. The undeniable truth was that part of why she was drawn to Derek, part of why Mark had become such a close friend was that they were all very much alike when it came to the confidence and innate arrogance that were part of being a great surgeon. And like her best friend and the man she loved, Addison was too sure of her abilities to really ever trust anyone else to take her place. But the driven surgeon in her was going to have to surrender and trust that those she trained could pick up the slack. Because the mother in her knew it was time, probably a little past time, to just sit still for a bit and get ready for the birth of her child.

Her little girl... the reality that Baby Girl Shepherd was only weeks away from coming into the world left Addison awestruck. She and Derek were going to be holding their daughter soon, picking her name, counting her fingers. It was a stunning thing considering where they had been not so long ago.

No sooner had that thought crossed her mind than Addison noticed she and Derek were driving past the Fairmont hotel.

She drew in a deep breath at seeing the place she had run to on the night Derek had chosen Meredith. It felt like years ago, but the truth was, it had been just over six months since she'd driven through Seattle to the hotel, heartbroken and uncertain what came next.

If someone had told her then that a few months later she'd be in a car on the way to dinner with Derek, his family in town to host her baby shower, her now ex-husband taking her out for a special dinner in his campaign to win her back... well, it went without saying she'd have responded by telling that someone they were absolutely insane. But she had never imagined then that she and Derek had it in them to do the hard, painful work it had taken to find the soul of their marriage again. And though it had been bruised, bleeding and damaged, that essence of "Derek and Addison" had still been there under the wreckage, alive and waiting for the care it deserved.

The CD that had been playing in the car stereo ended, the momentary silence pulling Addison out of her thoughts. She turned her eyes toward Derek and reached out, letting her hand fall lightly against his right thigh.

"You okay?" he asked, glancing toward her.

"Yeah," she replied as his hand dropped down to caress hers. "I'm okay."[/i]

They had thoroughly enjoyed their dinner at the upscale Southern restaurant Adele had sent them to, savoring the classic comfort foods and the rich pound cake they shared for dessert. Derek had even managed to get Addison out on the dance floor as the jazz band smoothly delivered an instrumental version of Ella Fitzgerald's "Too Marvelous for Words."

But the real highlight of the night for Addison had come once they were home and the new dress was hung up and the new shoes were gone. Derek sat at the end of the bed rubbing peppermint lotion over her sore feet while she listened to him talk about the next phase of the house construction. He was only discussing generalities really--more than once he'd told her he wanted the final result to be a surprise--but as he spoke Addison realized the whole idea of the house, of living there someday and of it being a home for her and him and their baby, no longer made her feel scared or anxious.

She told herself it wasn't a sure sign of anything. After all, Derek practically lived with her now in her house, and everything was fine, so it was natural that the idea of moving into his new home so they could raise their daughter together no longer seemed so intimidating.

Except... as she sat on Miranda Bailey's chaise lounge and thought back over the night, over the past few months, she knew that moving into Derek's house with Derek wasn't just about raising their little girl in one home. Derek had made it clear to her that the home was part of something he wanted that was much larger in scale--another marriage, another set of vows and their rings going back to spots they had occupied for more than decade. And Addison knew that what she might really be admitting to was the possibility that no longer being afraid of the new house meant she was no longer afraid of the commitment that came with it.

"All right, lady."

Addison opened her eyes and looked over at Miranda to see her friend setting aside her magazine.

"I'm gonna go get this little boy changed and round up my big boy and make sure he's presentable. You about ready to go unwrap 200 onesies?"

After securing Addison's reply that she was in fact about ready, Miranda went off to take care of her family business and then soon enough, with Tuck and Tucker in tow, the two were on their way back to the expectant mother's home for the big event. As they pulled up into the driveway, Addison wondered aloud if her neighbors might complain about there being nowhere to park on the street thanks to the volume of people at her home. Already you could hear laughter and soft music from inside, and Addison couldn't help but smile at the familiarity of the sounds from a big, loud Shepherd family party. There had been a time when she thought she'd never be part of one again, and there was no denying how good it felt to have that fear erased forever.

"There she is!" Nancy announced in her booming voice the moment Addison walked through the door.

She had surrendered the planning of the party completely to her sister-in-laws and mother-in-law with one caution--half her friends were men, and she wanted them to be comfortable, too, so a traditional "tea and games with dainty napkins" shower was out of the question. The girls had promised it would be something the boys could enjoy, too, and seeing what they had accomplished in her absence, Addison had to say they had succeeded in every way.

There was pink, of course, because it was a party for Addison and Baby Girl Shepherd. But it was hot pink, and it was found on cool retro decorations that featured a cartoon "Cosmo Girl" and the bar they'd had set up was producing pink cocktails of all types, including Cosmopolitans and strawberry milkshake martinis. But there was also some "blue" to be found in the room by way of Yankee pinstripes and the game playing on two different flat screen TVs Addison suspected were probably Mark's.

There were tables of food out and a stack of gifts sat on the coffee table right by Addison's favorite chair, though it was covered right now with hot pink cloth and had a large piece of white ribbon sitting diagonally across it to reserve it for the guest of honor.

Izzie ran up and hugged her excitedly as Addison took in the scene.

"Isn't it great? Those ladies know how to throw a party, I tell ya."

Tucker stood at Miranda's side near Addison and took in the scene. "A bar and baseball at a baby shower? I think I'm really going to like the Shepherds."

Addison laughed. "Yeah, any type of 'shower' is really just an excuse this clan uses to have a party--the bigger, the better. And I'm willing to bet there's a good supply of beer behind that bar."

Miranda responded to Tucker's hopeful look by taking Tuck and waving him toward the bar.

"Oh, you guys need your badges," Izzie exclaimed, then she disappeared into the kitchen momentarily before returning with two laminated plastic clip-on badges and a Sharpie, which she handed to Miranda. "Remember, anything but surgeon."

"What are you talking about?" Addison asked, but then she saw Izzie's badge. It read "professional baker."

"Everyone chooses a profession that Baby Girl Shepherd might go into that isn't being a surgeon. Then after you open your gifts, we'll put them all in a bag and you'll pick one and that'll be what she's gonna be... you know, in the baby book, at least."

"I love it," Addison replied. "But we'll let Derek do the picking, that way if it's bad, it'll be her daddy's fault."

"Thinking like a mother already," Miranda teased. "That's my girl."

The threesome headed into the fray, and as Addison exchanged hugs with Preston and Richard and Adele, she took in their badges, reading their various choices. Richard had gone for "therapist," commenting that Seattle Grace could use a good one. Adele had chosen "malpractice attorney." Preston, who loved only one other thing as much as he loved medicine, had selected "professional chef."

A loud cheer drew Addison toward the flat screen in the dining area. There she found Nancy, Kathleen, Leslie and Mary watching the game with Mark and Izzie, who had joined them. Surveying the plastic badges, Addison learned that her daughter might be the owner of the New York Yankees, the chancellor of Harvard University, an astronaut and the president of a television network, at least according to the Shepherd sisters. Mark, however, had picked a profession that made Addison's eyebrows rise.

"Shoe designer?"

He shrugged and then winked at her. "I'm pretty sure the shoe gene trumps the surgical one."

Addison chuckled and shook her head, then Izzie asked Mark to help her move some trays into the living room. He excused himself and followed the blonde into the kitchen. The moment they were out of sight, Addison felt herself surrounded by Shepherds.

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell us about her?" Mary demanded.

"About Izzie?" Addison looked at them, totally confused. "What about her?"

Kathleen rolled her eyes. "Addie, come on. We were all worried we'd come here and see Mark still crazy in love with you, and we were fully prepared to kick his ass and tell him that we love him and all, but to back off."

"Yeah, but then last night," Leslie continued, "we're at dinner, and he and the Barbie doctor..."

"Izzie," Addison corrected quickly.

"Izzie, right. They were all kinds of laughing and teasing and just..."

"Just?"

Nancy sighed and put her hand on her hip. "They just have a thing. You know that whole 'I'm trying to seem like we're only friends, but there's totally more going on here' thing."

Addison watched as Mark and Izzie came out of the kitchen together balancing two trays of appetizers. They were just being the way Mark and Izzie always were with each other as far as she could see. Sure, they teased and they joked, but that was what they did.

"You guys are imagining things. Izzie's had a tough time and Mark's been getting over this whole thing with me, and they've gotten close, but they're just friends."

Kathleen scoffed. "The last time Mark looked at someone he was 'just friends' with the way he's looking at this girl, we were at Mom's plotting ways to torture him for what happened with you."

The sound of her mother-in-law's voice saved Addison from further speculation, and she walked toward the backyard patio to find her. Derek was standing with her in front of the swing, and as she approached, the two moved apart to reveal Savvy and Weiss sitting behind them.

A flurry of hugs ensued, Addison thrilled with Derek's surprise for her. She was truly surrounded by all of the people who loved her and who she loved in order to celebrate the birth of her child. It was a situation as far away as possible from the fear and loneliness she'd felt at the hotel the first night of her separation from Derek all those months ago.

The party continued, everyone enjoying the drinks--even Addison, who sampled a variety of nonalcoholic pink drinks the bartender had concocted--the game, the company. Even Karev, O'Malley and Yang seemed to be enjoying themselves amongst the large group, despite their divided loyalties and in spite of the fact that Izzie kept threatening to kill Alex for writing down "underwear model" as his possible future profession for Baby Girl Shepherd.

Izzie's dark chocolate cake was a hit with everyone, even Patricia, who was rarely envious of anyone else's baking. Addison thought it was heaven, and when Derek got distracted talking to Richard about planning a fishing trip, she stole the best frosting-laden section of his cake off his plate.

"You did not just take my frosting."

"The baby wanted it."

He gave her a disapproving look, but a small smile broke out on his face as he leaned in to kiss her.

"You two are going to gang up on me for the rest of my life, aren't you?"

"What are you gonna do about it?" she asked, a playful tone in her voice. Addison was surprised though, when Derek's expression grew more serious and his lips pressed against hers intensely.

"I'm going to treasure it," he whispered, his breath teasing her lips. "Every minute of it."

She felt tears threatening at the love she felt in his words, and as Addison dropped her eyes to try and fight them back, Derek leaned against her, pulling her into his chest.

"See, now you're gonna get me in trouble," he teased. "My mom's gonna think I made you cry and my sisters are going to gang up on me, and then I'm gonna have to go outside with Doc and hide in the doghouse."

The scenario he painted was just enough to draw a laugh out of her, and the emotional moment passed. Derek let her go, moving to clear away their plates as his mother announced it was time for gifts.

The presents from their friends ranged from the onesies Miranda had teased her about to the latest in baby gear. There were more family heirlooms from Patricia and Derek's sisters had put together an amazing package of gifts that Addison recognized as a collection of all the things she'd given them over the years that they'd told her were invaluable or had been huge hits with their kids, including the a Fisher-Price Corn Popper, which Addison had long ago dubbed the greatest toy in the history of toys.

She and Derek were nearly through the large pile when Mark stepped forward and offered an envelope with a ribbon tied around it to Derek.

"A little something to make sure the kid gets the right education," he quipped.

Derek untied the ribbon and tore open the paper. Inside was a receipt for season tickets for the Seattle Mariners. Addison saw a hundred memories of baseball games in New York race through Derek's mind as he looked back and forth between the paper and the man who had been, for better or worse, such an important part of his life.

"Just make sure she knows this family roots for the Yankees, okay? Even on the Mariners home turf."

"Definitely," Derek answered, his voice breaking a little. "We're... we're a Yankees family all the way."

Addison felt her throat tighten, and she glanced toward Patricia, who looked as choked up as she was. They really all had managed to heal from the unthinkable and move on.

The gift opening resumed, and then Izzie produced a bag and collected the plastic badges all the guests had worn. Addison prodded Derek into doing the selection duties, and he eyed Alex Karev as he moved to the bag.

"If I pull 'underwear model' out of this bag, Karev, I'm going to make sure you do scut for a month, I swear."

But Karev was safe. Mark's shoe designer prediction was the one marked down in the baby book for posterity.

Hours later, after the guests had left and the Shepherds had returned to their hotel to rest, Addison found Derek sitting in their daughter's nursery looking at the room their friends had lovingly helped put together.

"I have something for you," she said as he took her hand and drew her over to sit on his lap.

"I'm pretty sure the baby qualifies as my gift," he countered, wrapping his arms around her.

"Well, it's not a gift so much as something I found the other day while I was doing some organizing. I seem to have started nesting, you know."

He chuckled and took the box she was offering to him. Inside he found a framed black-and-white photo of himself as a toddler. He was sitting on the floor building an impressive structure out of Lincoln Logs, his father beaming at his side.

"Your mom gave that to me," Addison explained, "when we went home to tell her we were engaged. She wanted me to see how cute our kids would be, I think."

Smiling, Derek studied the image. She knew he missed his father immensely, and that losing him was something Derek had never really gotten over.

"I hope I can be half the father he was."

She leaned closer to him and placed a soft kiss on his forehead.

"You are a wonderful father already," she whispered, reassuring him. "You chose to be a part of her life when you didn't have to be, and you've made her mother feel loved and safe and wanted. I really wasn't sure if we could ever get back to this place, Derek, but we have, and you worked so hard to make that happen."

He sighed, sitting the photograph on the dresser beside them before he tightened his hold on her.

"That was selfish, though, Addie. I mean, the truth is that... who I was without you? He wasn't the man I wanted to be. And I don't ever want to be that man again."

"I know," she said, nodding. "I know what you mean. I don't know how we ever let ourselves become those people who hurt each other so badly. But we got through it. Barely and with a ton of help from the people who love us, but we got through it. And I know that I haven't said I'm sure yet, Derek, but... I really do think we're gonna be okay."

It was truly how she felt after looking back on the last few days... they were working again, in every way, and there was just no denying it... still, it was far less than the ultimate promise he wanted from her. But the way Derek looked at her after she spoke, the hope and the joy she saw in his eyes, it told Addison that she'd given him the only gift he had really wanted today. She had given him back his family.

Commentary?

Contact the author