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The Sum Of My Sins -- The Trial
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The Sum Of My Sins -- The Trial

Author's Note: For those who didn't read the first story, this is a sequel to The Sum Of My Sins.


"Please, don't leave me. Sonny, don't leave me."

Sonny sank further into dark oblivion as he heard Alexis' words. He wanted to fight, to hold on to her voice and pull away from the darkness, but he couldn't. His body felt like a solid object, his limbs unmoving, his muscles hard and tensed beyond any ability to will them to respond to his commands. Fighting was futile, and so Sonny felt himself surrender not to the idea of the darkness, but to the truth that nothing mattered to him except that Alexis and their baby were safe.

Suddenly Sonny felt his body spun around, and he jerked his eyes open. His body was now free of the tentacled-grip that had prevented him from moving and he reached out his arms reflexively as if he were about to fight off an enemy. His eyes blinked, once, twice, and then they began to survey this new environment. Was it Hell? Heaven? Well, if it was either, Sonny mused, God and Satan had a weird sense of humor.

A courtroom. He was standing in a room that was clearly a courtroom. A line ran down its center dividing it in half. One side was pure white -- everything, the chairs, the floor, that half of the Judge's bench -- all white. The other side was an exact duplicate, only in all black. Sonny looked down and saw that one of his feet rested on each side of the line. He was also dressed, but not in the clothes he'd been wearing back at Rivera's compound. His body was now clothed in a set of loose fitting linen type pants and a matching shirt. The outfit was shapeless and colored gray.

What the hell is going on? Sonny thought, his mind fighting to grasp where he was now and how long it had been since he had collapsed into Alexis' arms and died there.

He was dead, right?

"Do you want to be dead?"

The voice was familiar, and Sonny hadn't heard it in forever. Despite his confusion, he whirled around, almost happily anticipating whom he would see. And there, on the white side of the courtroom, stood one of the truest friends he had ever known.

"Stone."

The younger man smiled and Sonny crossed to him, a smile forming on his own face as they embraced. After a lengthy hug that spoke of just how much the two meant to each other, Sonny stepped back and surveyed his friend. Stone looked not a day older than when he had died, but he looked healthy - gone were the gaunt cheeks and sad eyes that AIDS had slowly brought to his face.

"Sonny, I wish I could say it was good to see you."

Sonny nodded, understanding. He glanced around the room again and then looked back at Stone with pointed seriousness.

"I guess it's time for me to pay up, huh?"

"Maybe yes, maybe no," Stone said cryptically as he sat down on the edge of the table that occupied the white side of the courtroom. "There's still some stuff that needs to be straightened out before that decision is made."

Sonny looked at Stone quizzically. "What do you mean? I'm not dead?"

"Like I said," Stone replied, "do you want to be?"

"Of course not," Sonny answered quickly, a slight rise of anger in his voice. "Who wants to be dead, Stone?"

"You'd be surprised. Some people just don't want to put the energy into fighting for what they love or believe in anymore. Some people think it might be easier to just give up rather than keep trying."

"I don't give up," Sonny said coldly as he started to turn away.

"Yes, you do."

The words stung Sonny, and he whirled around and focused his now blazing gaze on Stone. Suddenly Sonny's mind filled with a white, brilliant flash of light and a barrage of images played out inside his head. His mother begging him to leave their Brooklyn apartment before Deke returned home, Mike pleading with his son for yet another chance, Brenda standing outside the church in the rain on their wedding day, Alexis walking back across the hall the day she'd told him she was moving out...the scenes caused physical pain to Sonny, and he brought his hands up to try and soothe himself. Then, just as quickly as they had started, the images left him and his mind quieted. Sonny brought his eyes back up to Stone.

"That's what you think, Stone, that I gave up on those things?"

"Those weren't my thoughts, Sonny, they were yours. I just helped you find them."

Sonny shook his head. That was wrong. He didn't feel that way. He didn't remember a time when he'd ever considered himself a quitter...that was just wrong.

"No, Sonny, it's right, it's right there in front of you." Stone's voice had taken on a quiet, gentle tone that reminded Sonny of the way he spoke to Michael when trying to explain something difficult. "Look again, Sonny, only honestly. What would your life have been, would your mother's have been, if you had refused to leave, if you hadn't stopped trying to save her from Deke? That question lives inside of you every day whether you face it or not.

"Your father, you give an inch and call it giving him a second chance, but the truth is, you decided years ago to never trust Mike again. You won't let yourself. You've wondered sometimes what might happen if you did, but you won't take the chance, Sonny, not really."

"I trusted him," Sonny said, launching a defense, "and he threw my money away."

"Money doesn't matter to you, Sonny, so it's easy to trust him with that, even knowing he'd fail." Stone stood up and walked closer to his friend. "What you won't trust him with is your heart."

Sonny felt a deep, clenching pain in his gut. He didn't want to hear this, and yet something in him told him that he had to. Steeling himself, Sonny locked his gaze with Stone and said, "what else?"

"Brenda - you gave up on her. You used her protection for an excuse, but the truth is you got scared, scared of how hurt you would be if you loved her the way you really wanted to. That's why you left her. That's why you gave her up, your fear for yourself. Isn't that why you lied to yourself about the baby, Sonny? Isn't that how you convinced yourself to give Alexis up instead of fighting for her? You let her walk out of your life to protect yourself, not her, not the baby. And you know it."

You know it. The words rang in Sonny's ears. He did know it. He knew it all.

"So, Sonny, do you want to be dead?"

That question again. And now the answer didn't seem so easy. What was the point of being alive if his fear was going to keep forcing him to push away all that he loved? He had always convinced himself that it was for them, even with his mother. He hadn't fought Deke harder because she had asked him not to, he did it for her well-being. But had he just been afraid that if he had challenged Deke, he might lose? Hadn't he always been afraid of what happened ultimately anyway, that his mother would chose Deke over him? Wasn't that always his fear? So his response was to take away the choice. If he couldn't be first choice, he would eliminate the choice altogether by removing himself.

Maybe that's why things were so easy with Carly, why he had chosen her. Carly needed him so much, wanted him so much, there was no danger that she would choose anyone other than him. That she was killing him with that need seemed irrelevant, at least it had until he had discovered her betrayal.

Now what did he want? Did he want to go back and fight, taking real risks with his heart, making himself truly accountable to those he loved, or did he just want to give in and say no more?

"Sonny, I'm here. I love you."

Alexis' voice. He looked around, wondering where it was coming from. Stone almost laughed at his friend, then he placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and walked Sonny to the edge of the courtroom near what should have been a wall. It was only as they approached that Sonny realized there were no walls, only what appeared to be an abyss of fog. Yet as they leaned over, Sonny saw that instead of nothing, he saw himself, his bloodied body being strapped to a gurney as Alexis stood by his side, Jason and Benny behind her. Sonny flashed his eyes to Stone.

"I'm still alive?"

"Like I said, we have some things to sort out before a choice is made one way or the other."

Sonny looked back at the scene that was taking place back in "life" and watched as Alexis climbed into the ambulance with him. As she had done once before, she held his hand and willed him to live. As was very different this time, she took his hand and placed it on her belly.

"We need you. Please, please don't go."

There was nothing else to think about. Sonny turned and looked back at Stone.

"No, I don't want to be dead."

Stone smiled and patted Sonny on the back. "Glad to hear it."

Sonny was about to ask how he got out of here and back where he belonged when another familiar voice, one that made his insides sick, bellowed from the black side of the courtroom.

"Not so fast, Michael. Who says you're worth another chance?"

Stone and Sonny both turned and leveled their gaze at the angry, ugly man who now stood across from them, his clothes black, just like his soul.

"Deke." The lone word was barely audible as it slipped from Sonny's lips. Stone's smile faded completely, and he quickly crossed to the Judge's bench, facing the empty seat.

"This wasn't part of the deal. You said if he decided he wanted to fight for himself, you'd let him go."

"Been a little change of plans there, boy," Deke said, an evil laugh escaping him. "See, I filed an appeal to that decision. I think Michael there has used up his second chance, and I say he wasted it. Why should he get another one? Especially when I got such a nice place for him reserved on this side."

Stone was angry and he looked back toward the bench.

"If you're going to listen to an appeal from the likes of him, then I want the chance to prove my case."

Suddenly the chair behind the Judge's bench began to spin around, first in slow circles, but soon picking up speed and whirling around. With just as startling a motion, it stopped, and facing Stone, Sonny and Deke sat a man who bore a startling resemblance to Steve Hardy.

"Stone, I know what I said, but after further consideration, I think this calls for a full hearing."

"I'll be allowed to call witnesses?" Stone asked.

"If he does," Deke piped in, "then so do I."

The Judge raised up his hand to quiet both men. "I said a full hearing and I mean a full hearing. Deke, since you represent the prosecution, you may begin."

Stone stepped back to Sonny and led him around so they could take their seats at the table on the white side of the courtroom. Deke stood up behind the black table and, after shooting a wicked grin in Sonny's direction, turned to face the bench.

"Michael Corinthos Jr. has done nothing with the life you gave him. He's disappointed everyone who has ever loved him, used people who trusted him, taken advantage of the innocent, and, let's face it Judge, killed."

"Objection," Stone called out as he stood up. "What happened tonight was self-defense. You can't hold that against him."

"What about me?" A voice asked from the witness stand. Sonny's mouth fell open as he looked up and saw Joe Scully staring back at him.

"You tell yourself it was self-defense, don't you, Sonny-boy, but was it really? Weren't you just ready to take over, to have all the power?"

Sonny leaned forward, his finger pointing at Scully as he spoke. "You were going to kill me. You threatened the people I cared about. I had no choice."

"There's always a choice, Sonny. You chose to come work for me, you chose to tell me about your big bad evil stepdaddy Deke. You chose death for him as surely as if you had pulled the trigger yourself." Scully leaned back in the witness seat, winking at Deke, as Sonny took in his words.

Stone turned and looked at Sonny. What Joe Scully had said was having an effect. Stone leaned down and whispered to his friend. "Sonny, they both spent your life telling you all the things they needed to in order to make you feel bad about yourself, to make you believe you didn't deserve any better. You let them win once. Don't do it again."

Sonny looked up at his ally, his friend, and nodded. Stone was right. He had let these men shape his life once. This time, the choice was his. Standing, Sonny walked toward the witness stand and toward Scully.

"You gave me a way to make a life for myself, and I owe you for that. But I didn't owe you my life or Brenda's life or Luke Spencer's. You chose to take my trust and use it against me. I did what I had to do, and I would still do it because you threatened everything that mattered to me. You turned on me, Joe, not vice versa. Remember that."

Standing tall, Sonny turned around and walked back to the white table. When he looked back at the stand, the witness chair was empty.

"Deke, do you have anyone else you want us to hear from?"

"You betcha, Judge," Deke answered as he shook off his irritation that Sonny had been able to best Scully so easily. "I call Adella Woods to the stand."

Sonny gasped audibly as his mother appeared in the witness box. She looked beautiful, and he felt tears moisten his eyes just at seeing her again. She smiled hesitantly at him before Deke's bellow pulled her attention elsewhere.

"Della, look at me."

Sonny watched as his mother responded crisply to Deke's order, just as she always had in life. It still broke his heart. Deke strolled confidently up to the stand and leaned against the railing.

"Is it or is it not true that your son, Michael Corinthos Jr. did not approve of your marriage?"

"Yes," Adella said, her voice trembling, "yes, that's true."

"And isn't it also true," Deke questioned, "that he tried everything he could to ruin your marriage?"

Sonny stood up and screamed out as Stone's hands fell upon his arms to keep him from leaping over the table. "You hurt her, you bastard, of course I tried to get her to leave you."

"Mr. Corinthos," the Judge stated calmly, "everyone here has a right to be heard. You will get your chance. Sit down."

Stone could feel steam literally rising off of Sonny's back, he was so furious, but he was also still keenly aware that what happened here would decide his fate. Though it took a few moments, Sonny calmed down and sank back into his chair.

Adella's eyes had watched him through it all. She once again felt the pride that had always filled her at her son's devotion and protectiveness. He was still such a good boy. Deke, noticing where her focus was, slammed his hand down on the witness stand to draw her eyes back to him. The fact that she jumped nearly six inches out of the chair didn't phase her "husband" at all.

"Now, Adella, isn't it true that you asked your son to leave your home because he attacked your husband?"

Closing her eyes at the memory, Adella nodded then added quietly, "Yes."

"And you did that because you thought Michael would kill your husband, right?"

Mother and son locked eyes as she contemplated her answer. There was truth in Deke's statement, but there was more. Adella had buried the more long ago, making it appear that she had taken her husband's side against her son's. Today, Adella decided to reveal the truth.

"Yes, yes that's true, but it wasn't you I was worried about, Deke, it was my baby."

Deke whirled around and raised his hand as if to strike Adella right there on the stand. But his hand would not come down. It took a moment for everyone to realize that the Judge's hand had also raised, and appeared to be holding a tight grip on something though there was nothing in his grasp.

"Deke, step back."

Through clenched teeth, Deke spoke. "I object, Judge."

"Objection overruled, now step back. Remember, Deke, Adella lives on my side, not yours."

Sonny almost smiled as he watched Deke struggling a few more seconds against the mystical force that held him in place. Only when he tried to move backwards was his body freed and he was allowed to lower his arm. Deke stalked back to the black table as the Judge tapped Adella on the shoulder and said, "continue, please."

Adella turned so that her eyes were once again firmly set upon her son. She felt tears slipping down her face, but she ignored them. "Michael, it was you I was trying to save. It was too late for me, but not for you. I knew that if you killed Deke, your life would be over, and I knew that if you stayed you would kill him. You were too good a son, too good a man to allow him to keep hurting me. But he was a cop, Michael, and if they hadn't killed you trying to arrest you, they would have put you in prison forever. I couldn't let that happen, sweetheart, I just couldn't."

Sonny's bottom lip trembled as he fought the urge to cry at his mother's words. He had always thought, on some level, that she had loved Deke more than him. Yet she had stayed with Deke and pushed him away hoping to save the boy he had been It was flawed logic, but he understood the choice she had made. No longer able to hold back, Sonny stood and ran to his mother. As Adella saw him come, she stood and opened her arms to him. Soon the son was wrapped in a mother's embrace too long denied, and both of their tears ran freely.

"I'm so sorry, Mama. You must be so disappointed in what I became."

"No, no, my sweet boy. Never disappointed. I always only hoped that you would find your way through the dark path you had chosen."

"But I've done terrible things, Mama, and I have hurt people, Deke is right about that."

Adella reluctantly pushed back from the embrace and brought her hands to her son's tear-stained face. "We all hurt people, Michael, what matters is that we try not to. What matters is that we do the best we can with what we've been given."

"Did I do that?" Sonny asked, his voice full of the same hopeful expectation Adella remembered in him as a boy.

"I think you tried."

It wasn't absolution, but it was honest, and Sonny knew it. He pulled his mother back into his arms as her hands stroked his back in a comforting gesture.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save you, Mama."

Adella smiled as she continued to soothe her son's tears. "Oh, Michael, you were my child. It wasn't your job to save me. It was my job to save you. I'm the one who is sorry."

How many times had people told him that, people he truly cared for and trusted, people like Alexis. But only now, hearing it from his mother, could Sonny understand. He had been a child, and he had done all that he could do. Looking up, he saw the smile that was on his mother's face.

"Why are you smiling, Mama?"

Adella's smile widened as she caressed his cheek. "It's just so good to see you again. But now I have to let you go. My granddaughter needs her father, so you fight the good fight. I'll be here when it's really time for you to be with me. I love you, Michael."

Sonny closed his eyes as his mother leaned forward and kissed his forehead gently. When he opened his eyes, she was gone. Swiping away at the errant tears still on his face, Sonny composed himself, then strode back to the table and to Stone. The Judge took a deep breath, then turned his attention back to Deke.

"Deke, do you have any more witnesses you want to call, and remember I've already excluded Rivera."

The reminder made Deke cross his arms and pout like a five year old. He plopped down in his chair and thought for a moment, and then, snapping his fingers, he leaned forward. "Yeah, Judge, I want to call Michael Corinthos, Jr."

Stone stood up and objected immediately. "Judge, Mr. Corinthos shouldn't have to defend himself against a man like this," his hand swiping to indicate Deke.

The Judge considered the objection for a moment, then nodded. "I agree, Stone, but I am curious what Mr. Corinthos has to say for himself. Are you willing to take the stand," he said, addressing Sonny directly, "if I ask the questions?"

Sonny looked to Stone who hesitantly nodded his approval. Sonny stood up and looked at the Judge. "Yes, I'll answer your questions."

"Very well, take the stand."

It was only a few short steps, really, to the witness chair, but Sonny felt he was walking the longest distance of his life. He was about to be interrogated by God. That was a pretty intimidating thought, and never before had he wished so strongly that Alexis Davis, attorney at law, was standing by his side.

"I don't blame you," the Judge said, laughing as Sonny took his seat, "she is a hell of an attorney." The Judge added a wink after his statement, and it made Sonny relax a bit, but only a bit.

"Sonny, 18 months ago you were fighting for your life after, I do admit, rather valiantly risking it to save Ms. Davis. You were clinging to life and I allowed your former wife to come to your aid, do you remember that?"

"Yes, I do," Sonny said, adding a nod for confirmation. "I remember seeing Lily and my children."

"Tell me, do you believe you made the most of the chance that Lily helped to give you?"

Lowering his eyes, Sonny thought about his answer. He knew that honesty was all he had left to fight with. And he had to keep fighting to get home, just as Alexis was fighting to hold on to him back at General Hospital.

"No, sir, I don't. I have let my choices, my guilt, hold me back from doing what I knew was right. I hurt the person I trusted most, the person I love most, by letting my past dictate my future. I'm sorry, you know, that it took me so long to figure things out. I know I wasted a lot of time on the wrong things and the wrong people. But I understand now that..." Sonny's voice broke as he looked up and saw that Lily was now sitting beside Stone at the white table. She smiled at him warmly, and as he smiled back, he found the words to go on.

"I understand now that to have the life I was meant to have, I've got to let go of my past." Sonny shot a hard glare Deke's direction as he continued. "I have to let go of the monsters that have controlled me. I have to want to be happy, want to be better than I am."

"And why should I believe that you're ready to make that change now, Sonny?"

"Because, Judge," Sonny began, his eyes once again seeking out Lily and Stone for comfort, "because I finally know what better is. Better is being able to look into the eyes of the woman you say you love and know that you don't just love her, you'd die for her, you'd give up everything you have if it meant that she would be okay. Better is wanting your child to have the things that you didn't, and I'm not talking about money or cars, but the important things. A mother to hold them, a father who loves them, a home they can feel safe in. I want those things now more than I want anything else I've ever known. I want them for me and for Alexis and for our baby. Please, give me the chance to try."

"You will have nothing but Alexis and the child. Everything else that you valued will be gone. You understand that?" the Judge asked pointedly, leveling his final challenge.

"I don't need anything else," Sonny replied with a confidence he had never felt before in his life. It was the confidence of a man who knew exactly what he wanted. And all he wanted was to hold Alexis and their daughter in his arms for the rest of his life.






Alexis had been at Sonny's bedside for more than 20 hours. The bullet had severed an artery and the doctors were amazed that he had lived long enough to make it to the hospital. They were further surprised that he survived the surgery. Now they kept saying things like, "you should hope for the best, but prepare for the worst." But Alexis knew they were wrong. Sonny would not leave her, and he would not leave their child. She had seen it in his face back at Rivera's. Sonny had chosen them over his life. He would not leave them now. And it didn't matter that there were a million things to sort out, things like Ned and what people would say or what Carly might do....Alexis just knew that none of those things mattered anymore.

Her only worry was the her concern about what she had done tonight. Alexis hoped that he would understand the choices she had made. Though she had been cautious about trusting Jason after he and Benny came to her and Sonny's rescue, Benny had convinced her to do so. And so she had asked them a question that she hoped had an answer she could live with.

"What do we have to do in order to make sure he's safe, that no one loyal to Rivera comes after him?"

The answer was legal, but it would devastate Sonny financially. Benny suggested handing over Sonny's entire powerbase to a specific set of fellow bosses who would guarantee Sonny's safety in exchange for his property. He would have virtually nothing left save for a few personal accounts, he would even have to give up the Harborview Towers and the penthouse. But when Jason concurred and said that he and Benny could make it happen, she had given the order. It would be her one and only act as the woman of a Mafioso, and she hoped that Sonny would understand why she had done it. Even if he didn't, she wouldn't regret it. She would rather him hate her forever and live than to watch him die. But those thoughts were in her head. Her heart was telling her not to worry. As with everything else not about them and their child, this, too, did not matter. Her heart seemed sure of it.

The groan was so slight, Alexis was sure her runaway thoughts had caused her to imagine it. Still, her eyes turned to Sonny and she looked at him intently, hoping against hope that he was waking.

"Sonny, it's okay, I'm right here. I'm okay, and the baby...our baby is okay. You saved us, Sonny."

And then the groan sounded again. Then again. Slowly, Sonny struggled his way out of the darkness that had held so tightly to him, and after what seemed minutes of agony, he blinked open his eyes.

"Alexis."

His voice was hoarse and weak from his ordeal, but Alexis knew she had not imagined him calling to her. She stood and leaned over him so that he could see her face.

"I'm right here. I'm right by your side, Sonny."

His eyes managed to find her and focus on her face. God, that beautiful face.

"I won't."

Alexis scrunched her brow in confusion. "You won't what, baby?"

Sonny smiled slightly. "I won't leave you. And I will never let you go again."

Crying, Alexis bent down and kissed his lips gently. Then she smiled and stroked her hand against his face. Silently, she thanked the heavens for not taking him away, and for giving them both another chance to make things right. This time, they would do better.

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